We are about to introduce one of the most incredibly unusual professions.  I understand that you are a full-time professional Organ Donor.  Just how does that work?

a)      It’s not really that incredible, I mean I don’t actually do much outside of banking the money.  Someone else does all the hard work and someone else pays the surgery fees.  I mostly just lie there until its over.  I have to change some bandages once in a while, but nothing strenuous.

q)      Now looking at you, you appear to have been through quite a bit of pain and have suffered disfigurement at some time.  Is that what prompted you to donate your organs?

a)      Oh, no – it was the money!  Once I found out just how much some one was wiling to pay for a piece of me, I got right into it.  Top dollar, nothing less. Not bad for a man with no education.

q)      There is obviously a limit to how many vital organs one can have removed and still maintain life.  What in fact have you donated to date?

a)      Your right about that, and although I got no education, I’m no fool!  I have specialised in that I only donate things I have more than one of and only from the left side.  let’s see, there was a kidney; an eye; ear; some hair, left thumb, ring finger and two toes; and a thigh bone.

q)      Pardon me, but I don’t think that thumbs and hair are classified as “organs”.

a)      You would be surprised what people ask for.  One chap wanted the whole nose but settled for the left nostril in the end.    Then there was the big multiple when they bought the elbow, hip and knee.  Those were used as models for artificial ones and then returned.   Came back better than they left.

q)      It would seem that you would have little left to donate.  What plans do have for the future?

a)      There are a few left-hand side spares still available.   After their gone, then I think I’ll go into the entertainment field.  I’ll only show my right profile of course, which limits my choices of activities.  Maybe a Heavy Metal rock band as a cymbal player.  Only need one hand and not expected to move around much.  Looking forward to it – on the right side of course.

© FC Mickey Benefiel